March 2012
35 posts
February 2012
43 posts
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Sorry I Can't Be As Pretty As Her
I really feel the urge to cut myself again because of jealousy. I dunno why but whenever I see this girls name I get really angry and self conscious. I just feel like something bad will happen because of her, and the thought of those bad things makes me want to cut. It’s not like this is the first time she pissed me off either. I don’t even know the girl but something about her just...
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Someday I want to be pretty
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Waking up feeling like shit and not knowing why...
So I’m starting to have these mood-swings again. The kind where you’re fine one moment and wanting to kill yourself the next. They’ve been getting progressively worse so not a good sign. I’m not sure why but when I woke up this morning I felt like cutting. I’m restraining though because I gave it up for Lent…which brings me to another problem. Whenever someone...
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Awesome Positive Idea Time
YAY! okay so this is probably the first positive thing I have ever written on this blog of mine, and hopefully there are many more of these to come. I have like a butt-load of homework but this idea was too good to not write about now. I’ve figured out a way to make the braces people less mad at me for breaking my braces (again). I, Alyssa, shall write a some-what poetic, and humorous pledge...
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Why am I so fucking selfish?
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Braces...
So I broke my braces AGAIN. Ughh FUCK MY LIFE. This was supposed to be my last month with them but because I broke them they’ll probably add on like six more so I’ll be ugly forever. Honestly I just wish I can get them off now. It’s been two years and every time I look at myself in the mirror I want to run and hide. I’m ugly enough without them. They’ve just caused so...
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I'm diagnosed with something
And by ‘diagnosed’ I mean it’s really a self-diagnosed thing even though my therapist mentioned it frequently whenever I’d have a session. I suppose I’ll ask more about it next time…Anyways It’s called “Catastrophic Thinking Disorder”. The name itself is pretty self explanatory but to elaborate it basically means I think up the worst case...
heydoodlehey asked: I give your new theme a liking:)
New Theme
tell me what you think :] <33
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My Funny Valentine
This boy right here is one of the most important people I have been blessed to know. His name is Erik and I love him very much. He’s my everything and I have no idea where I would be without him. He is kind, caring, and one of the nicest people on this planet. He laughs at my jokes, takes care of me when I’m sick, and never forgets to tell me that he loves me everyday. We have been...
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I almost cut myself at school today...
…because some ignorant fuck decided to look me straight in the eye and say “ewwww”. In all honesty I find this really ironic that this happened to me today on account of my pervious rant. I literally cannot stand people anymore, and it’s brainless, cruel, vicious, people like that who honestly make me want to kill myself. So great fucking job society, yet again you failed...
heydoodlehey asked: You are not ugly. not at all.
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Ranting Time...
So I’m going to CCD classes today, and I really REALLY don’t want to go….It’s not that I have anything against my religion it’s the kids that I have to deal with there. They are either people I really COULD NOT STAND in the past, or unbelievable obnoxious. As soon as I step through the church doors my social phobias kick in and I feel like they’re all staring at...
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This <3
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#nerdproblems
This whole week I’m going to be slaving over a video project that most likely going to kill me because I’m a perfectionist and I have to get everything timed correctly and bleh!!!
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Thinking...
I get so frustrated when I go to people’s houses and they are eating a homemade dinner together while I’m lucky to get Wendy’s or any other fast food meal (or not have food in the house for weeks for that madder) alone in my room. I just hope that if you actually get a home cooked dinner every night you should know how fucking lucky you are to eat as a family. Some families...
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With all the shit that has been going on recently...
guess we’ll just have to wait and see…